Posts Tagged ‘Empowerment’

Tell Yourself A Story (Newsletter Vol 2 Issue 6)

June 22, 2010

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)

Volume 2 Issue 6, June 22, 2010
Tell Yourself A Story

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In This Issue:

Tell Yourself A Story
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

Tell Yourself A Story

I received an email yesterday from an old acquaintance-friend, Sarah.  It was a letter telling me all about how wonderful her life has been over the past year.  A true adventure, the mythic hero’s journey filled with romance and castles, only without a wicked witch or any evil. 

I confess, as I read her letter, I began to compare my life to hers. And mine was sorely lacking.  I felt like someone kicked me in the gut and said “Hey, loser.  You’re wasting your life away.”  Lucky for me, my very close friend Cathleen quickly intervened.  “Sarah’s life isn’t better than yours or mine, she’s just a great story teller.  I’m sure she has problems like we do, only she just left those out.”

Then I wondered, what if I told the story of my own life over the past year in the same fashion that Sarah told hers?  What would my story be?

So I grabbed a cup of blackberry tea, and sat down with my laptop and started typing.  (more…)

Creating the Best Support Team (Newsletter Vol 2 Issue 5)

April 27, 2010

By Lori Howard

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)

Volume 2 Issue 5, April 27, 2010
Creating the Best Support Team

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In This Issue:

Creating the Best Support Team
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

Creating the Best Support Team

At some point in your pursuit of your goals, you will very likely encounter some sort of obstacle. If you don’t, I’d say you’ve you’re aiming too low.  Some obstacles seem overwhelming, insurmountable.  You run out of time or money or support.  You feel like you’ve hit the end of the runway, but the plane isn’t going to take off, instead, you fear you’re might crash and burn.

So what do you do? 

I want to talk this month about how to create support for yourself to keep you going when things get tough.  How to assess the value of your support system and then how to use it effectively. 

So right now, take a quick inventory of the people you are closest to, the one’s you trust.  List their names.  Let’s group them into simple types. 

–         Which ones are the ones who are great at cheering you up when you’re feeling down?  The ones most concerned with how you feel, and who want you to feel good.  Let’s call them our Cheerleaders.  Put a “C” next to their names.

–         Which ones are the ones who are great at analyzing things and finding problems in our logic or holes in our reasoning?  These are the problem-solvers.  The ones you talk over your ideas with when you are ready to have them challenged.  Let’s call them our Testers.  Put a “T” next to their names. 

–         Which are the really good listeners?  The ones who can listen to what you say without interruption, and respond with things like “So what you’re saying is …” or “I hear you…”  or “That sounds difficult/exciting…”.  Let’s call them our Listeners, and put an “L” next to them. 

–         Which ones are the ones who will call you out when you’re full of crap?  The ones who will challenge you that you can be more, do better?  Let’s call them our Butt-Kickers, and put a “B” next to their names.

It is important to have some of each of the Cheerleaders, Listeners, Testers, and Butt-Kickers in your support system.  It is equally important to know which type of support you need when you call on your support system for help.  Do you need someone to pick you up, remind you of how great you are, that you can do this?  Call one of your Cheerleaders.  Do you need someone to listen to you, and reflect back to you what you’re thinking and feeling?  To give you time to vent or clear your mind of thoughts and feelings.  Give a Listener a call.  Perhaps you need help fixing a problem to overcome an obstacle, actually looking at the solution you’ve come up with, and want to see if someone other than you thinks it will work, then call your Tester.   Or do you really need someone to call you forth, challenge you to step it up and bring your real A-game?  Boldly seek out your Butt-Kicker to come along and kick your butt. 

It’s important that you know who can do what in your support system.  Call on the wrong one at the wrong time and you could end up feeling crippled, instead of lifted up and helped along your way.   

Now, there’s one final category I’m struggling with mentioning, but I think they do exist and are important to discuss.  These are the Nay-Sayers.  The ones who no matter what you say or do, are always focused on the negative.  To them the sky is always falling and we are all doomed to destruction.  There is a difference between our Testers and these Nay-Sayers. Testers know how to dig in and find problems in our thinking.  The Nay-Sayers take it to a whole other level – and can be destructive to our hopes and dreams and ideas.  We may love them dearly, but need to limit our contact with them, especially when we’re in need.  Put an “N” next to their names so you remember who they are.  When you really need support, don’t go these individuals. 

So what do you do when you encounter those uber-challenging obstacles?  Take a moment to decide what kind of support you need, and reach out your support system:  Ask for help.  What if some people in your support system can serve as different types?  Tell them what kind of support you need. 

If your current support system doesn’t contain Cs, Ls, Ts, and Bs, then start looking for people to add to the mix.  Not sure how to do that?  I invite you to schedule an appointment with me and we can talk about how you can create a stronger support system for yourself and your dreams.

Unearth your worth™ today!

Warm regards,

Lori Howard

p.s. Post your thoughts below!

Recommended Resources

The topic in this section is resumes.  You never know when you’ll need yours.  Would you like to make your resume powerful and compelling? Check out this new product:  Write a Resume that Works!  For newsletter subscribers – there’s a special 30% discount.  Click here for details!

Would you like to just beef up the language in your resume to give your accomplishments greater impact?  Pick up this f*r*e*e list of Action Verbs.

Contact Me

I welcome your feedback, comments and questions. Also, if you’re interested in contributing to this Newsletter, email me your submissions.

Tell me what you think about this newsletter by posting a comment below.

website: www.coachforabetterlife.com
blog: CoachforaBetterLife.wordpress.com
email: Lori@CoachforaBetterLife.com

Click here to subscribe.
By subscribing to this newsletter, you will receive monthly tips, news, and information on how to live a more fulfilling life.

About this Newsletter
Copyright 2010 Lori Howard. All rights reserved.

Strengths Are Like Superpowers, Master Yours (Newsletter Vol 2 Issue 4)

February 22, 2010

By Lori Howard

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)

Volume 2 Issue 4, February 22, 2010
Strengths Are Like Superpowers, Master Yours

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In This Issue:

Strengths Are Like Superpowers, Master Yours
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

Strengths Are Like Superpowers, Master Yours

No matter what your life, your dreams, it is important to know what you do well.  What are your strengths?  Do you know? 

I like to think of strengths as our very own superpowers.  We must know how to use them.  We can use them for good or for evil.  We can use them to pursue our own goals and dreams and to help others.

If we haven’t mastered our strengths, if we don’t know how to wield them effectively for our purposes, they can become our weaknesses and undermine us.

Think of someone you know who is very observant and detail oriented.  They do precision work.  They obsess over quality.  We need these people, we need these skills – they give us quality work and beautiful things.  But these same attributes, applied to the wrong situation, can suddenly become a drag.  Overly analytical, slowing down progress, giving us a detailed price analysis when all we need is a quick “finger in the wind” estimate.  You see?  Good vs. evil.  Superpower to Achilles’ heel, because the person didn’t know any better. 

So what can you do?  How do you master your strengths? 

Step 1: Know your strengths – by name.  What are you good at?  Do you know?  One quick way to find out is to ask the people who know you, who have some experience of you, in whom you trust.  Try this quick assessment: Send an email to 3-5 friends or coworkers and ask them what are your top 3 strengths and your top 3 skills.  Let’s define strength as a character trait that you possess, and let’s define skill as something you do well. 

Want a more scientific approach to finding out your strengths?  Pick up a copy of Strengthsfinder 2.0 by Tom Rath, and you’ll have access to your own personal strengths assessment based on their extensive research.

Step 2:  Now that you know your strengths, be conscious of when you use them throughout your day.  Select one strength to focus on over the course of your day.  Ask yourself: is this attribute needed here?  Does this situation benefit from me engaging this strength?

Also notice when you DON’T use it.  Ask yourself the same questions: Is this attribute needed here?  Would this situation benefit from me engaging this strength? Would using this strength make it worse?

Step 3: Take one whole week and practice the use of that one strength.  Look for opportunities to use it, and observe the results.  Focus on mastering your strength, learning when to use it, when it helps, and when it doesn’t. 

Step 4:  Repeat for Step 3 for each of your strengths over the next month or two.  Master your superpowers.

Now, what are your strengths? Your superpowers? I invite you to discover your own strengths and practice using them.  Then, visit my blog to share what you learn as you master your own superpowers.

Post your thoughts below!

Recommended Resources

I’d be remiss if I didn’t give a link to the StrengthsFinder 2.0 website, so here it is: www.strengthsfinder.com.  It’s one of the few assessments with some research behind it that you can take yourself. 

Contact Me

I welcome your feedback, comments and questions. Also, if you’re interested in contributing to this Newsletter, email me your submissions.

Tell me what you think about this newsletter by posting a comment below.

website: www.coachforabetterlife.com
blog: CoachforaBetterLife.wordpress.com
email: Lori@CoachforaBetterLife.com

Click here to subscribe.
By subscribing to this newsletter, you will receive monthly tips, news, and information on how to live a more fulfilling life.

About this Newsletter
Copyright 2010 Lori Howard. All rights reserved.

Take Time to Reflect

December 14, 2009

We are nearing 2010, can you believe it? Amid the holiday chaos we all experience, it’s good to steal some spare moments and reflect on how the year has gone.

  • What were your goals for 2009? Think back on what you hoped for, dreamed for, and set out to achieve this year.
  • What did you accomplish in 2009? Consider what you actually got done. How do you feel about those things?
  • What did you overcome in 2009? Life always hands us challenges, obstacles, opportunities. What were yours this past year?
  • What were your pleasant surprises in 2009? Life also brings us gifts, unexpected treasures. Did you take note of them? You might even think of these as blessings.
  • Now the tough question – what did you fail to achieve in 2009? What are some goals you didn’t hit? We all have them. No beating yourself up here, just identify them.
  • The final question, and my favorite. What did you learn in 2009? What lessons can you use as you move forward into 2010?

I imagine your year had some ups and downs, some accomplishments, some heartaches, and some real blessings. Mine does. Take time to reflect on where you’ve come this year, and how you got here. What was the journey of 2009 for you? As you do this, you will be better able to identify your dreams and set your goals for 2010.

If you’re up for it, share some of your learnings with me by posting here, or by emailing me at Lori@CoachforaBetterLife.com.

Do You Have a Plan? (Newsletter Vol 1 Issue 10)

June 22, 2009

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)

Volume 1 Issue 10, June 22, 2009
Do You Have a Plan?
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In This Issue:

Ah, the Irony!
Do You Have a Plan?
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

Ah, the Irony!

”Write what you know,” is what the experts say.

This issue is about the importance of creating a plan. And the issue is a few weeks late, because I didn’t have a plan. (Ah, the irony.) (more…)

Dealing with Doubts and Your Dream (Newsletter Vol 1 Issue 9)

May 11, 2009

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)

Volume 1 Issue 9, May 11, 2009
Dealing with Doubts and Your Dream
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In This Issue:

Greetings!
Dealing with Doubts and Your Dream
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

Greetings!

Sometimes it appears that whenever we begin to take action toward our goals and dreams, the doubts and fears grow as well. And then we get distracted, and can get stalled. In this issue, we’ll deal with the doubts and get back into action.

(more…)

Craft Your Ideal Day (Newsletter Vol 1 Issue 7)

March 16, 2009

Live A Better Life Newsletter
(Tools and Tips for Intentional Living)
Craft Your Ideal Day
Volume 1 Issue 7, March 16, 2009

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In This Issue:

C’mon Spring!
Craft Your Ideal Day
Recommended Resources
Contact Me
About this Newsletter

C’mon Spring!

Spring is just around the corner. You can feel it, right? The days are getting longer, and temperatures warmer. A time of birth, creation of something new. What better time to look at what you’d like your life to be like? To craft your ideal life. That is the process we’ll begin in this issue.

(more…)

Stabilize your Core

July 3, 2008

In working with my clients – and looking at my own inner workings – I have developed this theory that we all have a set of things – that make up our core – or our foundation.  These are those things or areas of our life that provide us with a sense of security, safety, stability.  When these are compromised – or aren’t there – we can’t live out our purpose, we can’t go after a life of passion.  We can’t focus on it.  Let’s face it, we’ve all seen enough sci-fi to know that its very bad to de-stabilize the core. 
(more…)

Cleaning up relationships

November 7, 2007

“Keep only those things that build your energy, nourish your soul, or move your life forward – those that are handy, beautiful, or beloved.” – unknown

 I copied this quote from a magazine about 15 years ago – and I wish I had captured the author’s name.  I’d love to give him or her credit.  You see,  I have found this quote to be the KEY to helping me get my life in order. 
(more…)

Is focusing on our weaknesses worth the trouble?

July 2, 2007

I was talking with a colleague a few week ago – and he had decided to take some aggressive action to make progress in his life.  He started by asking those close to him to give him 2 lists:  his top  5 core strengths and his top 5 key weaknesses. 

My first thought was, how courageous. 
(more…)